Thursday, August 24, 2023

My Anxiety over the Future Prevents Me From Living Now


full image - Repost: My Anxiety over the Future Prevents Me From Living Now (from Reddit.com, My Anxiety over the Future Prevents Me From Living Now)
"I'm going to die before I'm 40 because of your mistake" is a quote I think of fairly often. It is said to come from a political staffer the night Hillary Clinton lost the presidency. I, personally, think we would have been fucked regardless but...the time scale seems accurate.I became collapse aware 6 years ago now, in my mid 20s. I spent months wrecked with anxiety trying to find a way out of our current horrible predicament, but every stone I turned over was implausible.Carbon capture is a bust, green energy is a bust, degrowth is a bust, AI is a bust...and on and on for roughly 6 horrible months. Finally I just accepted that civilization, like fire, is a dissipative structure that will die out once all its fuel is burned.However at the time my personal life was static and stalled. I was in a job I didn't care about, in a place I didn't care about, without a strong social network and having just ended a long term relationship. I became vegan, picked myself up and moved someplace that was much more fitting for me and my lifestyle.I have noticed then that I cycle. Periods of anxiety "centered around climate collapse" that actually had to do with personal issues and personal perturbations.I am in this place again, but I find it exceedingly difficult to tear my way out. Things I studied years ago and expected to happen in 2050 *are happening now*. The world feels worse and my pessimism is now much more wide-spread. I did not anticipate famine in my youth - now I wonder if I'll experience some sort of famine event within the next 5 years. How will I break out this time? The issue is that it's rational fear, but without the power to be productive with that fear. I can only keep going, collecting my paycheck to get to the next one while never building the resilience needed for what lies ahead.


Mining:
Bitcoin, Cryptotab browser - Pi Network cloud PHONE MINING
Fone, cloud PHONE MINING cod. dhvd1dkx - Mintme, PC PHONE MINING


Exchanges:
Coinbase.com - Stex.com - Probit.com


Donations:
Done crypto



Comments System

Disqus Shortname

Disqus Shortname

designcart
Powered by Blogger.