Saturday, June 11, 2022

TL:DR Early onset of depression while also stuck in an abusive marriage with a clinically diagnosed bi polar BPD head case


full image - Repost: TL:DR Early onset of depression while also stuck in an abusive marriage with a clinically diagnosed bi polar BPD head case (from Reddit.com, TL:DR Early onset of depression while also stuck in an abusive marriage with a clinically diagnosed bi polar BPD head case)
Yep, I’m about to be the guy that airs his dirty laundry and crappy home life in a post on social media. Im not the one to usually make a personal life drama post but I really need to vent and hopefully this post generates enough interest it gives me people to talk to…. Maybe not. Idk, I’m just so damn lonely and for the past couple months I’ve been feeling an early onset of clinical depression. I much I barley have any friends Im close enough to I can open up to or confine in and my wife as you soon will come to know is not the one to have some heartfelt and deep conversation with.Over the past 11 years the support system of family and friends I built up in my youth has faded away I’ve lost contact with almost of them besides my dad and sister, the latter who lives almost six hundred and a half something odd miles away. Some I deserved to lose due to youthful lust and narcissistic selfishnes on my part, some parted ways with me on good terms and just simply moved on with their life rather by graduating college, moving to another area of the country or some other circumstance where they had to close the chapter of their life I where I played a role. Most of my network of friends remaining got slowly severed when I got married and moved from the city to a small town an hour away in the summer of 2017. Slowly but surely I isolated myself from everyone besides my dad and step mother and my sister who eventually ended up moving out of state with her girlfriend. All I have now as far as having a deep meaningful relationship with goes is my step mom and father who I did stay with a few days when things got really bad between my wife and I Since the big move in 2017 my wife has became much more angry and hostile towards me.Verbally, emotionally and physically. I myself am on the autism spectrum therefore it’s hard for me to make and keep friends. You would think well think god for my wife right? I have learned throughout the years she will never be there for me in any meaning way. She treats me as someone to surmount and undermine quite frankly she just likes beating me down. Her mother especially does things to intentionally undermine me as a parent, as a person and someone worthy of dignity. Of course the wife does nothing about this. Her mother lives just to contradict what I say because it cuts me down as a person, it’s belittling and . I’m going to end up snapping on her one day. When she comes down for a visit she acts like she’s paying the bills here and runs the show. If there’s a week she’s staying video games go off and the living room TV is hers, she makes the rules, the children do what she wants and what she says goes. Every time she’s down here there’s tension just because the energy she brings to a dynamic. Now my wife suffers from a mental disorder officially known as boarderline personality disorder (BPD) she’s also bi polar a volatile mix. She screams,argues and verbally abuses me over the most trivial of things, even a basic conversation can lead to me being literally SCREAMED at. My wife is verbally, emotionally and physically abusive towards me. My mother in law and her treat me like hot garbage. Anytime I talk to her the inflection in her voice just gets really confrontational and aggressive for no reason it could be as mundane as “how’s the weather.” Her attitude towards me has just gotten progressively worse since moving up here. She always has been a hothead and has outbursts but it’s gotten so much worse.She ignores my calls, half the time she won’t pick me up from work, both her mother and Rose undermine me as a parent for no other reason then to shit on me. Today she goes off on our son because he didn’t want oranges and wanted something else instead. I snapped at her and told her very sternly not to talk to the children that way and she went ballistic!!! She started screaming on the top of her lungs for me to shut the fuck up and spewing other hate filled vitriol so loud I’m surprised none of neighbors called the police. This happened because I dared to tell her like it is and established a boundary in how I expect her to treat my children. I drew a line in the sand. I WILL NOT NOR WILL I EVER in a million years tolerate her literally screaming at my children and I NEVER will shut the fuck up about you mentally abusing our six year old son because you’re mad he won’t eat orange and wants something else. This type of aggressive communication with a confrontational tone will get called out. I would be letting them down my children as well as my future grandchildren as well as their future significant other down by standing by it . Best believe I got something to say when the way you talk HURTS THEM. It’s abusive and I won’t tolerate it for one second. You understand me….Rosanne!!! I will never let you and that crazy BPD addled brain of if yours scream with a such a hateful and vitriolic tone over trival nonsense ever again in front of me you’ll hear from me every time you do.My children WILL absolutely not be taught this is how healthy families communicate. How dare you treat me like Im wrong. I stood up for them them while telling their mother how she acted was wrong. If I stood by and said nothing just to buy some peace then I failed in my duties as their father and your husband. I was in no way wrong for holding you accountable and you had no right to scream at me so loud the neighbors could hear us and you definitely had absolutely no right to punch me in the back of the head and throw objects at me to prevent me speaking truth. I’ve put up with your shit for years because of those three little ones Im willing to sacrifice my happiness for.You hid the fact you had some kind of weird relationship with some guy you talked to like a boyfriend and practically cheated on me, you probably did fuck him but I accept the fact I’ll never get a he full story on that saga. You’re the only person I’ve slept with since 2014 and don’t think I never had any opportunities and many wouldn’t blame me if I did run off with someone else.


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