Thursday, August 1, 2024

Seeking advice on dealing with workplace trauma when answering interview questions for new positions


full image - Repost: Seeking advice on dealing with workplace trauma when answering interview questions for new positions (from Reddit.com, Seeking advice on dealing with workplace trauma when answering interview questions for new positions)
I am seeking advice if I should be honest about a prolonged stressful experience at my current workplace. Fearful that with the limited context I can provide in an interview, the prospect hiring manager may judge me. Or worse, think that I am the bad guy in the story who is bluffing around to project being a good guy. What is the best way to approach a typical but emotionally challenging question if it is hurting me when I answer it?Questions like:Why are you leaving your current workplaceTell me about a time when you had a difficulty working with an employeeTell me about a time when you persuaded your senior or staff engineerTell me about a time when someone disliked you at your companyIf you had challenges at your company, why did you work there for 2.5 years?How can I satisfactorily answer such questions without being anxious or fearful of misjudgement?Context (if needed)I moved to the US about 2.5 years ago to work for a large company that ended up overworking me and causing emotional disorders. I was overworked almost all work days and most weekends over the past year. My team lead and staff engineer would set unrealistic expectations and take advantage that I am on an employer tied visa and can't _just_ switch jobs or go back to my home country due to obligations (lease, rent, expenses, sunk costs, etc.)My manager and the leadership knew about the bad treatment but falsified that they don't know it in my conversations with them and always directed the blame at me. And that I could improve on my skills. It wasn't until I recently had an open conversation with people outside of my department who knew exactly what I was talking about and felt sorry for me. They instantly revealed that my department is notorious and everyone at the company knows to never work in my department. All pieces of the past two years of difficulties fell in and I feel dumb for not looking elsewhere sooner.I have been networking and actively applying over the past year. I am able to pass through almost all of the technical and soft skill interviews. Typically, 3 to 5 interviews in, I meet the VPs, CEOs or someone higher up for behavioral questions. I find difficulty in answering any question that probe into my current job. I mumble, sound anxious and instantly lose confidence. I probably sound like someone faking it when I answer as I try to work through my emotions.I get that they are necessary but I get an emotional turmoil or almost start crying as it make me recollect the abuse that I am going through. I have been seeking mental help for this so working on the emotions part.To answer those questions, I tried masking my emotions and taking the good parts and putting it together in answers. However, I am pretty sure the person interviewing instantly knows that I left out the details. I tried being honest but in my mind, I was fearful that the interviewer may think that I am the bad person who is bluffing by blaming the workplace. I worked at the company for 2.5 years for mainly the highly restrictive visa related reasons.I will be grateful for any suggestions and any way that I can convey my answers with honesty without being robotic or emotionless about it.Possible options that I could thing of:Take a low paying job right now and keep applyingFalsely project that I am happy at my workplace and work my way through the interviews (I am nervous that this may not work)Be honest but concise about my situation and say I am looking forward to working with them (this I can do but not sure if this is a good thing)Take the most difficult decision and pay to break lease and go back to home countryI greatly appreciate anyone helping.


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